Saturday, January 26, 2013

Do Something! Day 6

Good morning, all.  Day 6 is upon us!  How are you all doing?  I'm doing great, and looking forward to today's 90 minute yoga class.  I have a couple appointments today but I moved them around to accommodate my class, and I can't wait to see how I do with a longer class length!

My soreness of muscle is moving from place to place, now.  My ribs are achy today.  Must have done some good side stretching yesterday!  Legs are tired, but not as bad as they have been, so this gives me hope.  The body is learning what this is all about, again, and getting used to it.

Already noticing squish-factor reduction, but that happens for me pretty fast when I am toning up again.  I have muscle under that layer of squish, and it tends to burn off fairly quickly.  Now, whether the number on the scale has changed, I could not tell you.  I don't own a scale anymore.

Most people find that to be strange, but I have my reasons.  When I was growing up and there was a scale to be had at all times, I found myself using it.  All the time.  More than once a day.  And I would allow that number to tell me how to feel about myself.  It was not a healthy thing.

When I moved out, I didn't have a scale, probably because I didn't have extra money to buy one, but I lived happily without one for a few years.  And then I got married, and quickly was pregnant, and allowed myself to buy one.  You know, to be sure I wasn't gaining too quickly, and was gaining enough.  It was all fine and dandy during my pregnancy, because there was no desire to lose, and there was no such thing as "extra weight" then.  It wasn't weight, it was my baby, and I would just lose it later.

But then after that, I slipped easily back into my old habits.  Any time I was in the bathroom, it came out.  For no reason.  I allowed it to rule my feelings.  It didn't matter that I was gaining muscle and losing flab, so the number didn't change.  It didn't matter that my clothes fit much better and I was losing inches.  The number was king.

So when the bathroom floor flooded and my precious lithium battery hospital quality scale was broken, I made the conscious decision not to buy another one.  I do not need a scale to know how I feel about myself.  The number does not rule me.  My clothes fit well and I'm wearing a smaller size than I have since high school, so it does not matter that the NUMBER might be the same as it was when I was wearing almost plus sized clothing.

What matters is how I feel, physically, and beyond being a little sore, I feel great.  It's a good kind of hurt, the muscles growing kind.  My clothes are getting looser and fitting better, and my energy levels are finally in a good place.  I will take it.  That is what matters.

So my hope is that if you tend to let the scale tell you how to feel....  you might start to change how you think about that.  It took me years to get from that mindset to this one.  But it's food for thought.  :)  You are more than a number on a scale.  You are more than the size on the tag in your jeans.  Don't let those things rule you.  You are better than that.

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